Wednesday, 22 December 2010

To write....or not.

I’m struggling at the moment to find ‘my’ writing voice and this scares me. I am not finding it naturally, everything I write seems to me to be boring and forced and lacks anything special BUT this is what I want to do with my life, I want to write- I thought it was what I was best at- what if its not??? Then what am I supposed to do, eh?! 
I am creative, I play around with music, I can play and write music but really I’m only ok at this, I like to make things and draw and scribble and scrawl but again can only claim to have average talent at this, I take photos and some are good, but not ‘career good’, writing has always seemed to me to be ‘my’ outlet, the thing I can do. Speak to me, have a conversation with me, ask me to speak to a room full of people and I will probably stumble through my words unable to express what I want to say, eloquence and wit well and truly void. 
BUT that has been ok because before in my head I have known that I can write it much better, I can pen it into the written word and all of a sudden my private thoughts will be transformed to a language that others understand it, it is my thing that I can do and yet recently when the time has come to do something with it to really create with it……nothing. So my conclusion is practice, I need to find how I should write and a blog seems like the perfect place.
I would love to have a blog like some of the ones I read, some of them are written with such individual style and flare, leaving me wanting to read it the next day and the next, (for example here  and here) they give vivid snapshots into somebody else’s life and to me there is nothing more interesting than people. Nobody is boring and everybody has things happening in their lives which can offer insight to others.


 So I hope that somebody might find this interesting one day and that if nothing else it portrays a little of my life and what goes on in it, the good the bad, the achievements and the failures, the thoughts and the feelings that make up another life. 

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