Saturday, 11 June 2011

The five stages of Pigeon Love and other unrelated Sky and Flower photos


I was in the garden and captured the five stages of a pigeons love affair:


                                           The Chase- Boy seeks Girl

          
                                           The Kiss- Love blooms


                                          The Honeymoon is over- arguing all the time


                                           Drifting Apart- Getting further and further away....


                                           Flying Solo again :(      (Ps I had to wait a long time for the pigeon to fly off!)


And now onto non- pigeon photos. Earlier this week I promised some photos giving a view of my times lying on the floor and looking at the sky or ceiling if indoors (see this Post for explanation). I failed to do this as it turned into a week where there wasn't really any time for pauses, it was just go and keep going, relentless in every way so I didn't get my rest on the floor. So what I give you instead are photos from today of the sky and a rather nice pink flower which somehow blended against each other in the right kind of way.


So as I use this blog more and more and reveal more and more about myself I wonder what type of 'Blog Identity' I am creating for myself. Does what I write really echo who I am? Do my photos give insight into how I see the world? Which lead me to remember something I used to do when I was really young (probably about 5-10 years old).


I had a strange, boardering on insane thing i used to do and it was a way of making myself lack any identity- just becoming a face -trying to expel all those things that I associated with myself when I thought of who 'I' was. So I used to look into a mirror, stare right into my eyes and say over and over again....

'Who am I?, Who am I? until i could look at my face and just see a face and not 'me'. A blank face that didn't belong to anyone, just another human being and number I don't know why I did this strange thing because surely we want to know our identity and not just be a face that's what we strive to know, who we are and what we're about. I guess it was a way of humbling myself and realising the bigger picture that ultimately when time continues after i have gone I will just have been a number and another face.


So when I was younger I used to do that maybe because I knew myself too well and who 'I' was. As I've grown older I seem to know less and less who 'I' am and who 'I' should be and being happy with the identity I have. It's all entwined with what I think I should be doing and what comes next. Your identity becomes your job and who you know and where you live, how much you earn, what you wear- all the trivial things.


I think when your a child you just have the freedom to be who you are, nobody expects anything from you, there is less judging and you are encouraged to just be who you are, there is less concern about fitting in with what society and other expect.


The whole 'who am I' weirdness is similar to another random thing I have tried in the past- listen to somebody speaking and try not to understand what they are saying, so I'm English so I would try to listen to a conversation in English and try to listen to it as somebody who doesn't know the language would hear it just to know what the sounds of English are.

For example when I think of 'french' or 'German' I can imitate it without knowing any words because it has a certain sound and feel to it but its hard to know what this is if you can speak the language already. By the way it's an impossible thing to do, you just automatically understand what they are saying because the words are just part of you and your understanding of the world you can't train yourself to suddenly not know the language or meaning of the words that are now ingrained in you.

This could lead into all sorts of in depth discussion about how language is key to everything and how without language we wouldn't be able to think because we think 'in language', so I will draw this to an end before anyone still reading this frankly random and rambling post quite entirely.

Yes I was a strange, strange child it seems!

1 comment :

  1. Beautiful photos! I especially enjoyed the Pigeon Love pics :)

    ReplyDelete

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